Sticks and Stones

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.”  Heard that one before?  It’s a bunch of horse hockey. It’s a lot of mule muffins and cow pies. When I hear that quote, I am reminded that I forgot to fertilize my yard.  Names do hurt. Don’t dismiss that.  Sometimes they hurt worse than sticks or stones.  If you were ever called a negative name in your life; perhaps especially during your middle school years, you understand just how deeply words cut you. I watched a news clip of a recent study on obesity in the United States.  In case you have been hiding out in a news-deprived cave, you understand that obesity is a fairly large (no pun intended) problem in our country.  Mississippi leads the nation in the percentage of obese adults. In 2013, Indiana ranked eighth.  The point of the study was the psychological damage done with words declaring that someone is plump.  In this, a ten year old girl who is told by only ONE adult that she is fat, will be more than 4 times likely to be obese at age 19.  Not the prophetic message we want to convey.

What do you speak into your students? What we say to our students and how we say it is one of our most powerful teaching tools. As a teacher, you cannot teach a lesson, welcome students into your classroom, or settle an issue without using words.  The Association of Supervision and Curriculum Development, a well-respected organization in education, lists three ways that positive language shapes learners. (1) Affecting students’ sense of identity, (2) Helping students understand how they work and (3) Influencing our relationships with students. It is that last one that I want to emphasize.  Do you want good relationships with your students?  Your choice of words and the tone of those words can go a long way in establishing that relationship.  Your students need to trust you.  You do this beginning with your words and then by demonstrating it with your actions.  Kind words produce good results toward this.  Demeaning words produce negative results.  Kind actions produce good results. Demeaning actions produce poor results.  Great teachers work hard at developing rapport with their students.  Ineffective teachers make no attempt at this vital ingredient.  Speak positives in to the lives of your students and you will have a much better chance of those same kids producing at higher levels.  If the only attention they get from you is negative attention, then don’t expect much to change.  It’s a conscious choice.